Human Rights and Marriage

I'm sure everyone who has a facebook or twitter or access to any type of media knows that today there will be a supreme court ruling on gay marriage. This has been a subject that often times people around the world are not comfortable dealing with. It has also, as I'm sure you know, been an idea that many people oppose or have struggled to accept. I'm writing this post today to address some of the resistance and the bigotry and hopefully make some people think twice about how they view anyone in the gay community.
To me gay rights are not gay rights, they are human rights. Anyone who is of any homosexual orientation is a person and they should be treated as such. I'm tired of hearing about people being bullied, harassed and even attacked just because they are different from the majority. They deserve better. They deserve the same treatment that heterosexual individuals receive. They are made of cells, blood, flesh and skin just like everyone else. The only different is that they are programmed to love people of the same gender. While it may be a controversial topic I DO believe that they are born gay. They do not choose to be gay. Why would anyone choose to be gay in a place where they would be persecuted the way so many Americans persecute them now? This country needs to stop punishing people for being born. The cycle of persecuting those we don't understand is just repeating itself.
If you look back at the history of America we are denying rights to gay people in much the same way that the Irish and the black community were denied them. Why can't people see the similarities now? Why can't they see we are doing the same things now that we did to the immigrants so long ago? America is supposed to be a country dedicated to freedom and equality, not freedom and equality to those that our leaders deem worthy. The Declaration of Independence says "All men are created equal..." it says we have the right to "The pursuit of happiness." If we founded our country on such documents why are we ignoring them now? Further more why shouldn't our gay citizens be allowed to marry? That would not hurt anyone. The only reason it bothers people in the first place is because they are ignorant and afraid of what they don't understand. They have a right to pursue their happiness, even if it means marrying someone of the same gender and I hope that today America realizes this.

Respecting Our Troops

So today's post is going to focus on my general frustration with people using social media to bash, degrade and disrespect our troops. I've noticed since I've been at college that many students have begun to say and post things that are in direct opposition to our US troops out of ignorance. This is the main reason why I did my short documentary 'Away." I wanted to show what the troops experience and why we should be grateful to them. It not only bothers me but offends me to see people take to the internet or the media to disrespect the people in this country who have the hardest job and are sacrificing everything so we can have our freedom.
First off, the troops don't pick the wars and they don't start them. It's all of the world's stupid politicians and leaders that do that. It's the same communist leaders that have launched strikes against the US that you feel "sorry" for that are starting conflicts with the US. The troops we have are protecting us and defending our freedoms. It doesn't matter what your political feelings are about a particular conflict, you should still support the troops and give them support for what they do. They are willing to die to protect you but you're going to get on the internet and talk about how they're awful people? Well why don't you reevaluate yourself. You probably haven't ever put yourself in front of bullets for people you don't even know, you probably haven't even had a remotely challenging job in your life and somehow you think you can judge them, can degrade them, can be cruel to them. I can tell you one thing, they aren't the horrible people in this situation.
Further more, it isn't their fault that people in other countries are dying in these conflicts. When they are battling the enemy they have to defend themselves. As for any innocents that die, HOW DARE YOU put that on them. That is not their fault. The people leading the country that started the war are responsible for that. They are responsible for the innocent lives lost and for those of our troops. I'm not saying that our government has always made the best decisions in regards to conflicts but the fact is we are living in a time where terrorists have not only attacked us but are continuing to threaten us and we have the right to self defense. Our troops above all else deserve our respect and our thanks. I only hope that the people I have seen posting the crap about our troops see this and rethink how they act and rethink what they say.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vha02P7DxZ0 My documentary in case you need to see a tiny bit of what the troops experience

You're a girl, so stop doing that.

I've noticed that our society tends to tell women that can't do a lot of things because they are women. Now I'm not talking about things that may jump into your mind like receive equal pay or equal treatment in the workplace, I'm talking about how they are treated romantically/sexually/casually. I have seen women get criticized for not going on dates with pushy men and for not having enough sex or having too little sex.. Society often acts like women need to be nice to people who are getting on their nerves even though a lot of men are not held to that same standard.
If you need examples I have a few, some from me and some from friends. First off, I've noticed if a man hits on me and I tell him politely to leave me alone or that I'm not interested, I'm a prude, mean or stand offish, but when when men tell women they aren't interested or to leave them alone they are just simply being honest and expressing their need for space. I've had this happen to me several times. When I was in high school a boy that I had only met once asked me out and when I told him no he began to harass me daily and threaten me with death and worse. He even went as far as to smash up one of my male friend's mailboxes just because I talked to them more than I talked to him. When I brought this issue up with the school's resource officer he asked me "Well, why didn't you just go on a date with him? It isn't nice to turn a man down." Now, when one of my male friends was being harassed by a girl that he said no to going to prom with he had no trouble getting the resource officer's help. The same officer that denied me help immediately acted for this young man and stopped the young woman from bothering him. Why? Because society thinks women shouldn't say no to men.
The one that really bothers me though is the issue of how much sex a woman has. Mainly because that's HER business and not for anyone else. In high school, mine specifically, a lot of girls were called prudes and uptight because they weren't having sex. Then the girls that had had sex were whores and sluts. Yes, men deal with this too but more often than not men are called pimps for having multiple sex partners. I saw so many high school girls have their values or self esteem torn down by the people they went to school with even though the boys were praised if they were or were not having sex . Now in college, I have seen a lot of girls still going through the same exact thing or dealing with worse. I have heard men say things like "That girl is such a prude, she needs a good f*** to fix that," about women who haven't had sex. I've also heard men accusing women of having STD's because that have had sex more than once. The fact is it's not anybody's business. So what, if a woman is choosing to not have sex or choosing to have sex? It's her life, and her personal choices should not be broken down and examined unfairly by society.
While these problems can also apply to men I have seen them apply to women more often than not. Society needs to get out of the "Mad Men" mindset and realize women can do whatever they want and that they shouldn't have to worry about what is taboo or not. Women should not have separate standards of behavior than men. If men can say no to dates, so can women. If men can choose how much sex they have (even none at all) than so can women. We, as a society, should not be treating the same issues differently.

Mental Health

Recently I've had to deal with a lot of anxiety issues, my own and those of others as well. A lot of people have come to me when they go through anxiety attacks or just feel overwhelmed because they know I get it. While I'm an understanding person there are many people out there who don't understand, and those who will never understand. Most of those people have never had an anxiety attack or they're from an older generation. Whatever the reason for not understanding it, those who don't understand often make dealing with anxiety a lot harder.
I, myself, have been called crazy, stupid, overly sensitive and melodramatic for having anxiety attacks. Every time I would hear this it would make me feel like those other people were right and maybe I was just crazy for having an anxiety attack. Maybe I was overly sensitive and I needed to get myself under control before I made them feel more uncomfortable. The fact is that isn't the case. While everyone that has anxiety problems or another mental health problem needs to find a way to deal with it you should never feel bad or apologize for it. There are so many people in the world that face this issue (it's actually very common) and they shouldn't feel crazy for it. Of course the lack of sensitivity to mental health issues relates back to a lack of education.
Most people who just write off others as crazy because they have a mental health disorder are not educated enough on the issue. Most of them are ignorant to mental health issues and the way to handle people that have one. Sometimes this is just a failure of the education system and other times it is because they refuse to learn about it. Whatever the reason, this needs to change, and fast. Society needs to learn how to react, care for and understand mental illness and various disorders. Why should they have to learn about other people's problem? Simply because millions of people suffer from these issues and as a society we cannot continue to ostracize and discriminate against others because of ignorance. Those suffering from any type of disorder shouldn't be made to feel ashamed or lose a job because there isn't proper education on mental health.

Women aren't Greek Statues

So Today while browsing the internet I found this wonderful image:
Of course I say "wonderful" sarcastically. Now as a person who has suffered with skin problems, including acne, for a very long time, I can safely say that not only does this add offend me but it disturbs me. The fact is nobody on this planet has perfect skin. It really bothers me that a company which prides itself on making you feel confident with your skin would put this out as an advertisement. They are not only implying that acne is unsightly but they are implying that it will repulse men away from you. Other than this just being shallow, it's wrong and should make people, women especially, avoid buying their products.
Women aren't Greek statues and we should not be held to some higher standard of beauty because it is what society deems attractive. So what if you get a few pimples? Only a jerk would care about it anyways. Acne is temporary and minor compared to the grand scheme of things and if someone loves you that is not what they'll be looking at. Companies need to STOP thinking it's acceptable to degrade women and target their insecurities to sell products. They are selling a shallow and unrealistic brand of beauty to women and young girls and they shouldn't be getting away with that. So the next time you're out shopping for beauty or skin care products, really think about how the company advertises to you. Would you still associate with someone in public that mocked you because you had a few blemishes? Then why would you give them your hard earned money?

Oh, and Proactiv, on a side note, I tried your products once at a friends and I not only had an allergic reaction to it but it made my skin breakout more.

You're Dressing Like a Whore: High School Dress Codes

So I came across this article today all about how dress codes negatively impact and shame middle and high school girls. This article discussed the fact that in high school girls are made to wear clothes that are sometimes next to impossible to find in stores because of what is in style; all so they can accommodate men in the classroom and stop wandering eyes/minds. I agreed with almost everything that this article said. I remember being that high school girl that couldn't wear her shorts and tank-top to school in 80+ humid weather because they violated the overly conservative dress code. It didn't matter that I was burning up and sweating like crazy in a pair of long jeans and a t-shirt, what mattered to the school was that I didn't upset the male faculty or students.

The dress code at my old high school is below and I have highlighted the ones I take issue with.


The Bedford County Public School Dress Code prohibits the wearing of any of 
the following:
 Bedroom slippers, pajamas, or lounging pants
 Clothing or accessories that advertise, glorify or symbolize any illegal 
substance, alcohol, drugs, tobacco, or illegal acts
 Clothing or accessories that contain vulgar, derogatory, violent, or 
suggestive diagrams, pictures, words, or slogans
 Clothing or accessories with gang insignia or symbols
 Dresses, skirts, shorts, and skorts shorter than five inches (the length of 
an index card) above the knee cap when standing 
 Exposed undergarments
 Hats, bandannas, head covers, sweatbands, sun visors, and sunglasses 
(unless prior arrangements are made with the principal for medical or 
religious reasons)
 Heavy chains worn as jewelry or belts and free swinging chains 
 Heelies or footwear with wheels
 Leggings/Jeggins without a dress, skirt, or shorts
 Oversized clothing that causes sagging pants, skirts, shorts, or skorts
 Trench coats 
 Pants, skirts, shorts, or skorts worn low on the hips so that 
undergarments or bare skin is exposed
 Revealing, immodest necklines three or more inches from the lower 
part of the collarbone (the width of a 3 x 5 inch index card)
 Sheer or transparent clothing
 Slits, splits, cuts, and holes in clothing shall not exceed 5 inches above 
the top of the knee
 Spiked jewelry, clothing, and accessories
 Strapless tops or any top with shoulder straps less than three inches 
(the width of a 3 x 5 inch index card) (Students in grades K-4 may 
wear tops with straps less than three inches, but may not wear 
spaghetti straps)
 Tops that are cut so short that bare skin in the midriff area is exposed 
 Tops with large arm holes such as tank tops, basketball jerseys, muscle 
shirts, mesh shirts, athletic undershirts, and cut out shirts (these types 
of shirts may be worn over a shirt with sleeves) 
 Wallet Chains that exceed six inches
 Note: Shoes must be worn at all times


I realize that some of these dress code restrictions are for safety and that is fine with me but I feel that a majority of these are targeting female students so that they feel it is THEIR fault that a male might have wandering eyes or mind. The fact is almost all teenage boys are going to think like little pervs about the girls in their class, nothing can stop that from happening. I could wear a parka to school and they still would have come up with something sexual to think about. All of these provisions are ridiculous in another sense, try finding shorts or skirts, tank-tops, or regular blouses for school  that don't break these rules. The fashion industry does not put out clothing for high school girls that match these specifications. To top it all off, if you have a school event where you have to wear a formal dress, try finding one that looks nice and doesn't break these rules.
Personally I think that these dress codes further objectify young girls. They make the public think about them in a sexual way because they are being told shorts or tops that don't match the code are explicit and sexual. They also make it hard for male teachers to NOT notice if a girl is wearing something shorter than the code says is appropriate. Girls in high school are not to blame for how men and society are looking at them. It's narrow minded people who come up with these rules. It's the people saying that if a girl has legs or boobs that they should be ashamed and cover up even if it's too hot to do so. Men in the classroom would probably even pay less attention to what high school girls are wearing if there weren't ridiculous clothing restrictions like this in place. To be honest they should have the freedom to wear whatever they want to as long as their parents let them walk out of the door in it.



Here is a link to the article that made me write this entry: http://hellogiggles.com/the-length-of-my-skirt-is-not-a-problem-stop-making-it-one

The Truth About How Feminists are Received

Just a disclaimer before we begin: I like feminism. The world needs feminism, but I believe that a lot of feminists are being received poorly due to radicalism and being hypocrites. I am in no way saying that this is the case with all feminists but I am pointing out why people don't view their views in a positive light and why a lot of women do not want to be associated with them.
A lot of feminists today will go around proclaiming the inequalities that women suffer and fighting for equal pay and treatment under the law. This is wonderful, but I've noticed that many times if a man suffers the same injustice they don't care or sometimes they even mock it. For example there are a lot of female comedians that make jokes about men that border on the sexist and hint at being serious. These jokes are received as funny and lighthearted, but when a male comedian does the same thing many feminists have a call to action to figuratively put his head on a pike and boycott his comedy.
This reaction also translates to more serious issues. Feminists organizations often take up a call to action when a woman says she was raped and a court won't file charges because she had alcohol in her system. This is something that should be done and be taken care of, but they do not do the same for men. If a man has the same issue occur they often times ignore it. Rape is rape and should be prosecuted as such. They should not act as if it doesn't happen to men. The fact is a lot of men are raped after drugs or alcohol have been in their system and can't take the issue to court because those are found in their system, but feminists often do not take this seriously and perpetuate the stereotype that only women are endangered of being drugged or raped. In case you believe I am exaggerating here is a quote (and link) to an essay that talks specifically about the problems in how feminists define, treat and deal with rape vs. other forms of gender based violence and male victims.
"When I say rape is privileged in feminist discourse, I don’t mean that it benefits anybody. I believe that by focusing on the centrality of rape in our culture, feminists are actually making it more difficult for all of us to campaign against all forms of gendered violence in society.

Trying to work out why these feminists do this is difficult. My instinct is that holding onto special victim status has some pay-offs for feminists. They can continue to present gender politics as a binary opposition between men (potential rapists) and women (perpetual potential victims of rape). Basically, the concept of rape culture is misandrist, and it does not allow for the fact that women are sometimes perpetrators of sexual assault, and men are sometimes on the receiving end."

http://www.avoiceformen.com/feminism/feminisms-mythological-rape-culture/
In addition to this many feminists themselves will stereotype men as being misogynists out to undermine female progress. Some like to post about how men can't reason as well as women and how women are just in general better than men. Sarcastically posting that women rule and men suck is one thing but when feminist women get online and post stereotypical comments about men there is usually a serious undertone to it and it makes all feminists look bad. Another problem that many feminists encounter is that men think all feminists are trying to be superior to them because they see these comments online or in the media. They don't realize that it's only the more radical feminists doing things like this and it creates a huge problem with the perception of feminists.
I'm not trying to generalize all feminists, but I want to point out why they encounter so much resistance. The fact is, all feminists need to look at their actions and make sure they want men and women to be equal. Not to just put men down and feel superior to them. I want feminism to get back to its core goals and beliefs and get rid of the hypocritical, extreme parts of it. I know there are always radical people in all groups but I want to see the mass opinion on feminists change. I only bring this up because that is how the world views the feminist perspective today, because too many feminists behave this way. Just to demonstrate my point here is a meme about how many people view what feminists have to say about themselves and men.

Reality Life and Bad Parenting

I haven't posted for the last two days but that's because I decided to be a little lazy.

I've been sitting around today, without much to do and I've started watching really lame reality TV shows. I've always known that most of these are fairly idiotic and not worth the attention that they so often receive. These reality shows though, like Honey Boo-Boo, The Jersey Shore (and all of its spin-offs) and the Teen Mom series are perpetuating a lot of stereotypes and negative behavior. I'm not one of those fanatics that thinks TV shows are brainwashing America's youth but I do think that they aren't helping our society in any way. I've noticed each year that teachers are reporting more and more middle school students and high school freshman are causing major problems at school. I've heard more about violent fights, bullying, alcohol at school and I've seen much more "cyber-fighting" and drama on Facebook from adults and recent high school graduates. I think reality shows are part of the problem.
These shows can't force anyone to behave like the characters shown, but I do think they heavily influence the people actively watching them. I think part of the reason that so many preteens and young teens are getting in more and more trouble and becoming more and more sexualized is because of what adults are showing them is acceptable in the media. There are countless videos out there that show young girls fighting and yelling at each other in a startlingly similar way to what is depicted on  reality TV.
Part of the problem is the way parents have raised their children but I still think it links back to what society is showing as acceptable behavior. I'd like to see more meaningful shows on the air. I don't think we need a show to give us a moral compass but we need less stupid reality shows and better parenting to start fixing these incredibly immature teenagers. They are growing up in a way that will render them ignorant and they will never have the maturity to succeed in the adult world.